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Did you know that science has found that people with high IQ level are surpassed 70% by emotionally intelligent people?

Knowing how to control emotions, reflecting on them and putting their findings into practice can make you better than the “genius”. However, let it be clear that there isn’t a competition between intelligence. The purpose here is to make you start noticing that your thoughts have a logical perspective, one you may not even know. Seeking to understand your own emotions and others’ is one of the most exciting activities.

People with well-developed emotional intelligence are generally considered self-confident, persistent, motivated and able to control themselves. It does not mean, however, that we are talking about people known as “kind” or “cute” or someone who is looking for constant approval – this is a common confusion. According to an expert on the subject, (and my idol, by the way) Daniel Goleman, people with a high level of emotional intelligence tend to be more successful. These people are capable of controling their emotions, have a good social life and constantly evaluate their own attitudes. Recent research has proven: emotionally intelligent people are those who do well in their work environments.

One study, just so you get an idea of the size of it, evaluated the lives of 17000 people, from when they were children until they reach adulthood, for 50 years. The result: people considered emotionally intelligent were more successful in their careers than those with high IQ scores. And it does not end here! Research suggests that people who have developed emotional intelligence in adolescence or early adulthood not only succeed in their jobs, they live long stable relationships, in addition to having low levels of depression and anxiety.

An emotional intelligent person is one who can identify their emotions more easily. One of the greatest advantages of people with emotional intelligence is the ability to auto motivate and move forward even in the face of frustrations and disappointments. Among the features of emotional intelligence is the ability to control impulses and motivate people and other qualities that can help encourage others. Emotional Intelligence can be subdivided into five skills: emotional self, emotional control, self-motivation, empathy, develop interpersonal relationships.

Of these items, which may still be unknown is empathy, which, in general, is the ability to see through someone else's eyes. So how about starting to think twice before judging someone by their social status or their attitudes? In some situations, only those who go through a specific experience, can speak properly about it and yes, it strengthens and lets you better understand the other.

In other words, empathy is the ability to put yourself in someone elses’ shoes and see the world as they see it. In reality there are 3 kinds of empathy: affective empathy, cognitive empathy and emphatic concern.

Affective empathy is when you have an emotional response to what another person is feeling in the way that a sad scene in a movie can make you sad too. Effective empathy helps you connect with others.

Cognitive empathy involves consciously imagining how someone feels in a situation without internalizing it. It´s important in a negotiation or when a doctor is treating a patient, as being overcome with emotion in those situations can prevent you from doing your job properly. However, cognitive empathy alone can have the side effect of making you seem cold or insensitive.

Finally empathic concern is a combination of affective and cognitive empathy. This means you consciously understand and internalize the emotions of another person and are driven to help as a result. Emphatic concern allows you to understand how others feel and respond appropriately.

It´s true that technology is continuing to change the way we do business and interact with each other. Organizations are automating processes and using new tech-based tools. But not all innovation is created equal. Products fail when they don’t meet the needs of people. Involving users in each step of the design process (human-centered design) helps ensure new products are useful in real-world settings. And while the influence of technology is growing, our need for human connection is unchanging. So when the people representing your organisation show humanity and kindness, now more than ever, it stands out.

In surveys with employees on what makes a good manager results show that people want to feel like their manager listens to them. This is a huge issue. When leaders, really listen, using empathy to understand what the person is thinking or feeling without trying to change them or fix them or solve their problem, the person feels valued as a human being. And when people feel valued, they feel safe. They feel that they matter. And this means they are free to be themselves and to perform their work. In other words, we are more productive when we feel valued.

What does it take to be more empathetic? Why don't we do it more often?

For one thing, it requires we pay attention! We have our own agenda. We are busy. So we don't pay attention to what others are thinking or feeling. In order to improve, we need to be more self-aware and more aware of others. For example, the next time you ask someone how they are doing, listen to their response. Do you believe them? Are they really okay? Ask yourself if you care to learn more. If so, then ask them a question or share your observation.

Empathy is a choice. We have to choose to improve, to care, to get out of our own way and to bridge the gaps between us. Empathy allows us to be fully human and gives others permission to do the same!

Celfocus People Team

Who we are?

Putting an ironic spin on the term “lab rats”, a group of scientists create the artificial unit Arthur, which has the ability to feel emotions and is therefore known as an EI (as in “emotional intelligence”) – compared to the more common AI.